Realistic Self-Care: My New Pair of Pants

BTW, these aren't the pants I bought...

Today, I dared to take a pair of "regular person" (i.e. non-maternity) pants into a retail store change room. I'll admit I was nervous, because my experience has been that, even if I manage to shimmy them over my hips, my baby-induced extra weight and blown abdominals defy the closure of any zipper or buttons.

But, today, I am triumphant. Today, for the first time in over four years, a pair of off-the-rack pants fit me! Never mind that said pants are double what used to be my usual size; I bought them anyway. They are a symbol of my progress to-date.

When I originally began my baby-weight-loss journey, I told myself I wouldn't buy any new clothes in my plus-size. This pledge was both a cost-saving measure (why buy something when you're planning on it not fitting you in the near future?) and meant to provide extra incentive to stay focused on my end goal.

Or at least, so I figured.

Various people told me that positive self-perception would boost my commitment to losing weight, but I figured my practical side would wrestle my vanity into submission. Turns out, a little vanity is practical! Truth is, I make better choices to take care of myself when I feel good about my appearance: I'm more inclined to grab an apple than a chocolate bar, more motivated to head to the gym once again, willing to resist late-night urges to snack.

Whatever the psychology, when we feel good about our appearance, we work to keep feeling our best.

I'm not suggesting that every time we hit a stage of appreciable change in our transformative journey we should blow the bank on a new wardrobe. I bought two pair of very affordable pants, one that fits me right now and one that I can just zip up without slicing myself in half. That second pair of pants I am able to wear immediately, but they remind me that I mustn't slack off in my efforts, that the journey has yet to be completed.

So, if there's an (affordable) item that would celebrate your intermediate accomplishment and help you feel a little more chic or "together," then maybe you should get it! Over the course of a long haul, we all need some encouragement...

(On a related note, there are lots of "weight-loss journey" writers out in the blogosphere, many of them with people still part way along the journey and not using professional air-brushed photos of themselves --just very real. If knowing others are journeying too will help, check some of them out...) 

How about you? What keeps you going when you're in the midst of a lengthy work-in-progress? 

My Fav Low-Fat Pumpkin Pie Recipe

I'm aiming to bring a couple of pumpkin pies to the extended family Thanksgiving dinner this weekend (ask me next week if they actually got made...). If your family is like mine, then pie is the only item I can count on my kids eating at Thanksgiving. So, I like to make mine as healthy as possible, y'know, relatively speaking.

I've had really good success working off the Best Light Pumpkin Pie recipe at FoodandHealth.com, but with a few changes:

Low Fat Pumpkin Pie Recipe

16 ginger snap cookies
2 tsp oil
water as needed
16 oz pureed pumpkin (2 cups)
1/2 cup egg whites (that's about 3 eggs-worth)
1 cup sugar
1 1/2 cup 2% or no-fat evaporated milk
1 tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp each nutmeg and ginger
1/4 tsp cloves

1. Grind or crush the ginger snaps. Mix with the oil and enough water to moisten (not wet) and press evenly onto the bottom and sides of a pie plate. (I use either an 8" or 9" pie plate, depending on what's clean.)
2. Mix remaining ingredients together. (Adjust the sugar and spices, if you like, according to your family's taste.) Pour into crust.
3. Bake at 350 C for appx 45 min, or until centre of pie is set and knife inserted into middle comes out clean.
4. Refrigerate. Enjoy!

If you like extra spice, try mixing in some chopped candied ginger or some ginger jam with the filling before baking. Yum!

Do you have a healthy pie recipe you love? Share it with us!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

A Clean Green Round-up: The Four Green Cleaning Products You Really Need

In an earlier post, I shared some tips on how to approach spring cleaning, Realistic-Mummy-style. An additional aspect of this is limiting the complexity of the job, namely simplifying your cleaning arsenal!

I find it boggling that there seems to be a separate product available for nearly every conceivable domestic cleaning job, in addition to the "general purpose" cleaner. At last count, I figured I'm supposed to truck in at least four different bottles of stuff for each room I tackle, plus find space to store the myriad of bottles when they're off-duty.

If you're looking to simplify, here are the basic tools that also work wonders in a variety of situations:

1. good-quality vegetable-based soap

I'm talking about some simple dishwashing liquid soap. It's amazing what some hot water with a little soap will clean. Almost everything! Walls, countertops, floors... It's the first thing I usually reach for.

What I use:

I've tried a lot of different dish soaps and found they are not all created equal. Citrasolv has impressed me with its long-lasting, hard-working suds.

Citrasolv dish soap

2. soap-scum removing antiseptic cleaner

In the bathroom, something to cut through soap scum is helpful. Look for a cleaner with some antiseptic properties as well --tea tree oil or orange essence are common ones. (And, if your bathtub works as hard as ours, a synthetic scrubbing pad or nylon brush in addition to the cleaner are unbeatable in removing that tenacious grime residue!)

What I use:

Nature Clean's Tile & Bath Cleaner for everything in the bathroom --tub, sink, toilet, faucets.

Nature Clean tile & bath

3. vinegar

Yep, plain ol' household vinegar is a great multi-purpose cleaner, especially for glass and mirrors. A lot cheaper than commercial glass cleaner, it also doesn't release toxic chemicals into your home. The secret of getting (virtually) streak-free glass? Use a small amount of vinegar and rub vigorously with lots of scrunched newspaper. 

4. water

I spritz a little water on a soft clean rag, just enough to dampen it, and use it for dusting. This has worked reliably for me, safely dusting even my grandmother's antique dining room sideboard!

(Okay, I lied; here's a fifth one:) 

5. laundry detergent

For cleaning clothes, we use a single, unscented vegetable-based detergent for everything: baby clothes, fine washables, darks, lights, etc. Got stains? Pour a little detergent directly on the stain, rub in and let sit for a few minutes; then wash in the hottest temperature water the fabric can take.

And, truly, skip the fabric softener and dryer sheets --for the cost and extra step, they don't add anything useful (plus, the conventional ones are purely nasty chemicals).

  

What I use:

Bio-Vert unscented high-efficiency detergent.

Bio-Vert laundry detergent

With lots of companies offering green cleaners, it seems that part of our reluctance to banish noxious chemical cleaners is based on our fixation with pseudo-perfection. Let's just lay that burden down, sisters and brothers! (A few streaks on your mirror? Really, who cares?)

Plus, I've noticed that in our city, most large supermarkets now carry some natural cleaners, so they're even easier to get ahold of. Excuses, your time is up!

(That said, do read the label before buying a new brand... just 'cuz it says "green" on the package, doesn't mean it is "green"!)

How about you? What products are your best performers?

Cargo bike: The No-Car Family Mover

With the arrival of good weather a lot of us start thinking about bike riding. My partner and I love peddling around, but after we went from one kid directly to three when our twins were born, I found I was out on my bike virtually never, as both of us needed to be available.

What to do for the urban mummy on the go with more than two kids?

The answer came via friends with three young children and no car: a cargo bike! I had not known these genius contraptions even existed, but apparently they're common in Europe.

WorkCycles

Essentially, a cargo bike is a bicycle with an extended platform between the handlebars and the front wheel, making room for a cargo bin, flat hauler skid or numerous configurations of people seats. Online, I found styles that accommodate two, three or four kids, sometimes even with additional cargo space!

My interest peaked, our friends generously offered to loan it to us for two weeks. With my four kids (then aged one, almost three, almost three, and five) I took several trips with the bike, including to local parks and across town on a day trip.

What a blast! The kids loved it, and cars generously shared the road with us (presumably owing to our impressive width). Certainly it handled a little differently than a regular bike, but after taking it slow for a few minutes I caught on quickly. It was easy to get the kids in and out and wonderful that they were in front of me and up at car-window height.

Babboe: what our friends have...

One caveat would be regarding steep hills: cargo bikes don't seem to come with a great range of gears and, being heavier, can be a challenge to peddle up a serious incline. And that heavy weight means it's no easier to get off and walk it up.

But, unless you live in a super-hilly area, a cargo bike is a great alternative to a car for a multi-kid family.

(A helpful site to find local dealers in parts of North America is http://www.cargobike.ca/)

Have you ever tried one? Share your experience with us!

Spring Cleaning Tips for the Realistic Mummy

Unless you resort to paying someone else to clean your home, the idea of "spring cleaning" remains just that --an idea-- for the Realistic Mummy with a house full of young kids. The irony, however, is that if you do have a house full of little kids, then it almost certainly needs a good spring clean!

What's a Realistic Mummy to do? Here are some tips that I've found helpful:

  1.    Toss the baggage. The most important tip is to collect all those mental images of a fully clean house, sparkling from top to bottom, with linens aired, rugs beaten, clutter annihilated... and then throw that collection of imaginary baggage out the window! Get real; you live with a herd of mess-inducing, time-sucking small beings whose current purpose is to create chaos. Ditch the idea of a thorough clean-job, and accept a relative improvement in the level of domestic grime. This stage won't last forever (I keep reminding myself)...

2.    Think small. I've confessed before that my tendency is to wait to vacuum until I have time to vacuum the whole house, which is pretty much never. I've had to learn, therefore, that piecemeal jobs are better than none. Now, I clean/tidy in whatever snatches of time I find, tackling only as much as I can accomplish in a few minutes. So, sure, my house is never completely clean or tidy, but I can take satisfaction in a just-dusted shelf or a momentarily smudge-free mirror. And (I remind myself yet again) this stage won't last forever...

3.    Respect your limits. Accomplishing things feels good, but don't be tempted to push it. Your kids have been quiet while you do a certain job; don't think it will last! You'll only cause yourself stress if you try to sneak more in than is reasonably possible (emphasis on the "reasonably" part). Feel good about what you can do, and resolve to ignore what you can't.

4.    Cut yourself some slack. While we'd like to have a perfectly (or even imperfectly) clean house, what's the consequence if for a few years we don't? Yes, we want to avoid squalor and hoarding, and we don't want to lose track of certain essential items (like keys and wallets). But beyond staving off those extremes, what are we afraid will happen? Too often we forget that we make our own stress. Keep your cool (I keep reminding myself) and stay confident in your own ability to evaluate what's truly important.

This actually is something that rarely gets done...

I've explored here a few ideas on helpful ways to think about cleaning jobs, rather than ways to clean, basically because I find lists dealing exclusively with the latter tend to make me feel like I've got to add more things to my to-do list. (Bleh!)

My tip #5 is on simplifying your cleaning arsenal, but I'll expand on that in a separate post, to follow...

Until then, gentle readers, please share your own spring cleaning ideas, tips and experiences!

The (Returning) Working Mummy

I knew, even looking from the outside, that functioning as a working parent was hard. When I was home full-time, I would sometimes spy neighbours trekking with their kids to the daycare at some un-godly hour before 8 a.m. I thought, how do you get a pack of kids up, fed, dressed and out the door by that time? Everyday!?! Ack!

Thankfully, as the new bread-winner parent, I'm responsible for moving only one child to a second location before work. (My astonishment has still not diminished at how a lone kindergartener can fill 15 minutes with getting boots, a coat and a knapsack on. I'm getting a reputation with the teacher as the "always late" parent.)

In addition to new routines, there's also been the adjustment to new realities. Like the fact that I now see my kids only at breakfast during the week and on weekends (they're in bed by the time I get home from work). I went through what I imagine is very common kiddie-withdrawal for the first few weeks. But I must confess that putting up photos of my boys at my desk at work largely quelled that inner cry --though I certainly look forward to spending time with my young'uns.

Honestly, what I'm finding hardest is having very little time on the "margins," with this blog being one of the most obvious casualties. I do have some time for personal activities; for instance, I've started going to the gym again. However, I view a return to exercising as more re-incorporating a necessary aspect into my life, particularly in light of my post-baby weight and muscle-tone issues.

What's had to give are the "extras," including socializing, sewing and writing. (Not to mention, to a large extent, cooking and cleaning! Laundry gets done --otherwise I go nude to work.) This is not a new quandary for parents of young children, just a new one for me. And I know things will eventually settle in to routines and feel less foreign.

But, in the meantime, as we figure out how to create a little more space in the margins, bear with me if I'm posting far less frequently. If you're experiencing a similar situation, how are you finding it?

Radical Christmas Tree Alternative: Bunting Flags

We're going to be "that" family. The family that has an alternative Christmas tree. Post-last-Christmas season, I shared the crazy that goes down in our house with the arrival of a Christmas tree. To sum up: a small disaster. So for this year, I decided to re-think the whole situation and try something new.

Enter the idea of bunting flags. (For those not into crafting/sewing trends, these are strings of flags of the type that I associate with used car lots, and nicer versions of these are remarkably hot right now as whimsical decor.) I still wanted greenery, and opted to combine the flags with a cedar garland.

I had hoped to add lights and ornaments (this was in lieu of a tree, after all), but given the December we had I got Realistic and decided they could wait for next year.

If you'd like to DIY, here's my method for Bunting Flags:

1. Make a template of the size flag desired including a 1/4-inch seam allowance. Mine was approximately 12 inches long x 6 inches wide at the top.

2. Using the template, cut out a selection of flags, two pieces for each finished flag you want. (I did wash and iron my fabric prior, just in case I ever need to launder our flags. Weird stuff happens in our house.)

TIP: Using a rotary cutter with a long acrylic ruler and cutting mat really makes this step go quickly.

I got fancy with some and combined different fabrics.

3. If the flags will be hung in a doorway or window, you may want to add a liner piece to any light-coloured patterned flags so that the pattern from one side doesn't show through on the other side. I simply cut plain white pieces from an old sheet using the same flag template.

4. With right sides of the fabric (i.e. patterned sides) together, join two flag pieces by sewing along the two long sides. If including a liner piece, just add it on top of one of the flag pieces before sewing and stitch all three layers at one time.

TIP: At the "V" where the two side seams meet, sew one stitch straight across instead of making a point. Oddly, this makes it easier to produce a sharp point when you turn the flag right-side out.

5. Trim the seam allowance close to the seam near the point. Then turn the sewn flag right-side out. (I used a wooden skewer to gently prod the narrow end into a point.) Press.

6. Repeat the above steps until you have enough flags for your desired length. Using double-folded bias tape (available at a sewing supply store), insert the flag tops into the centre of the folded tape and sew close along the bottom edge of the tape.

7. Hang and enjoy!

Did you re-imagine any of your Christmas traditions this year?

I Think Homer Simpson May Be On To Something

The weeks leading up to the holidays were exceptionally busy for our family (which explains my blogging silence), with the top-3 developments being: 1) we adopted a second dog (yes, we're crazy); 2) all 4 kids were truly ill, and have continued to be for the past month; and 3) I got a job!

Perhaps it was all this extra stress on top of the usual holiday busyness, or maybe my kids are just going through a really annoying phase, but this Christmas season I did not have "peace" and "joy" at the forefront of my thoughts. Nope. Rather, the past few weeks I've wanted to throttle my young'uns more than at any other time.

Please understand that we did enjoy many moments of fun preparing for and celebrating Christmas --it wasn't a total wash. And, most important, I did not in any way actually throttle my kids. I just really, really wanted to. I even began to understand Homer Simpson and the impetus for his over-the-top methods of discipline.

I've reached previously-unknown levels of anger before in response to my boys' periodic misdeeds --you know, all that stuff that makes parents crazy, like non-stop complaining, outrageous fickleness, baiting you to see how you react... But for the past few weeks it has seemed that we spend all day, every day mired in these behaviours.

And this affliction of sour-puss-ness has beset not just one, but all of the boys. So I've been trying to deal with one insolent lad and have had the others, one after another, add their own needs to the mix, always things that require my immediate intervention. The net result is that I feel like I whirl from one problem to the next until we finally wrestle the kids into bed.

I admit that I found this year's holiday a bit disappointing, as a lot of things didn't get done or felt rushed due to everyone's crankiness or low energies. But the reason I share our experience is to let anyone else who needs it know that sometimes family celebrations fall a little short of the Norman Rockwell ideal, and that in those moments we all identify a little with Homer Simpson. (*Though we never behave like Homer Simpson, because we are the adults, we know better and that would never be okay.)

So... how was your holiday?