Spring Cleaning Tips for the Realistic Mummy

Unless you resort to paying someone else to clean your home, the idea of "spring cleaning" remains just that --an idea-- for the Realistic Mummy with a house full of young kids. The irony, however, is that if you do have a house full of little kids, then it almost certainly needs a good spring clean!

What's a Realistic Mummy to do? Here are some tips that I've found helpful:

  1.    Toss the baggage. The most important tip is to collect all those mental images of a fully clean house, sparkling from top to bottom, with linens aired, rugs beaten, clutter annihilated... and then throw that collection of imaginary baggage out the window! Get real; you live with a herd of mess-inducing, time-sucking small beings whose current purpose is to create chaos. Ditch the idea of a thorough clean-job, and accept a relative improvement in the level of domestic grime. This stage won't last forever (I keep reminding myself)...

2.    Think small. I've confessed before that my tendency is to wait to vacuum until I have time to vacuum the whole house, which is pretty much never. I've had to learn, therefore, that piecemeal jobs are better than none. Now, I clean/tidy in whatever snatches of time I find, tackling only as much as I can accomplish in a few minutes. So, sure, my house is never completely clean or tidy, but I can take satisfaction in a just-dusted shelf or a momentarily smudge-free mirror. And (I remind myself yet again) this stage won't last forever...

3.    Respect your limits. Accomplishing things feels good, but don't be tempted to push it. Your kids have been quiet while you do a certain job; don't think it will last! You'll only cause yourself stress if you try to sneak more in than is reasonably possible (emphasis on the "reasonably" part). Feel good about what you can do, and resolve to ignore what you can't.

4.    Cut yourself some slack. While we'd like to have a perfectly (or even imperfectly) clean house, what's the consequence if for a few years we don't? Yes, we want to avoid squalor and hoarding, and we don't want to lose track of certain essential items (like keys and wallets). But beyond staving off those extremes, what are we afraid will happen? Too often we forget that we make our own stress. Keep your cool (I keep reminding myself) and stay confident in your own ability to evaluate what's truly important.

This actually is something that rarely gets done...

I've explored here a few ideas on helpful ways to think about cleaning jobs, rather than ways to clean, basically because I find lists dealing exclusively with the latter tend to make me feel like I've got to add more things to my to-do list. (Bleh!)

My tip #5 is on simplifying your cleaning arsenal, but I'll expand on that in a separate post, to follow...

Until then, gentle readers, please share your own spring cleaning ideas, tips and experiences!

The (Returning) Working Mummy

I knew, even looking from the outside, that functioning as a working parent was hard. When I was home full-time, I would sometimes spy neighbours trekking with their kids to the daycare at some un-godly hour before 8 a.m. I thought, how do you get a pack of kids up, fed, dressed and out the door by that time? Everyday!?! Ack!

Thankfully, as the new bread-winner parent, I'm responsible for moving only one child to a second location before work. (My astonishment has still not diminished at how a lone kindergartener can fill 15 minutes with getting boots, a coat and a knapsack on. I'm getting a reputation with the teacher as the "always late" parent.)

In addition to new routines, there's also been the adjustment to new realities. Like the fact that I now see my kids only at breakfast during the week and on weekends (they're in bed by the time I get home from work). I went through what I imagine is very common kiddie-withdrawal for the first few weeks. But I must confess that putting up photos of my boys at my desk at work largely quelled that inner cry --though I certainly look forward to spending time with my young'uns.

Honestly, what I'm finding hardest is having very little time on the "margins," with this blog being one of the most obvious casualties. I do have some time for personal activities; for instance, I've started going to the gym again. However, I view a return to exercising as more re-incorporating a necessary aspect into my life, particularly in light of my post-baby weight and muscle-tone issues.

What's had to give are the "extras," including socializing, sewing and writing. (Not to mention, to a large extent, cooking and cleaning! Laundry gets done --otherwise I go nude to work.) This is not a new quandary for parents of young children, just a new one for me. And I know things will eventually settle in to routines and feel less foreign.

But, in the meantime, as we figure out how to create a little more space in the margins, bear with me if I'm posting far less frequently. If you're experiencing a similar situation, how are you finding it?

Radical Christmas Tree Alternative: Bunting Flags

We're going to be "that" family. The family that has an alternative Christmas tree. Post-last-Christmas season, I shared the crazy that goes down in our house with the arrival of a Christmas tree. To sum up: a small disaster. So for this year, I decided to re-think the whole situation and try something new.

Enter the idea of bunting flags. (For those not into crafting/sewing trends, these are strings of flags of the type that I associate with used car lots, and nicer versions of these are remarkably hot right now as whimsical decor.) I still wanted greenery, and opted to combine the flags with a cedar garland.

I had hoped to add lights and ornaments (this was in lieu of a tree, after all), but given the December we had I got Realistic and decided they could wait for next year.

If you'd like to DIY, here's my method for Bunting Flags:

1. Make a template of the size flag desired including a 1/4-inch seam allowance. Mine was approximately 12 inches long x 6 inches wide at the top.

2. Using the template, cut out a selection of flags, two pieces for each finished flag you want. (I did wash and iron my fabric prior, just in case I ever need to launder our flags. Weird stuff happens in our house.)

TIP: Using a rotary cutter with a long acrylic ruler and cutting mat really makes this step go quickly.

I got fancy with some and combined different fabrics.

3. If the flags will be hung in a doorway or window, you may want to add a liner piece to any light-coloured patterned flags so that the pattern from one side doesn't show through on the other side. I simply cut plain white pieces from an old sheet using the same flag template.

4. With right sides of the fabric (i.e. patterned sides) together, join two flag pieces by sewing along the two long sides. If including a liner piece, just add it on top of one of the flag pieces before sewing and stitch all three layers at one time.

TIP: At the "V" where the two side seams meet, sew one stitch straight across instead of making a point. Oddly, this makes it easier to produce a sharp point when you turn the flag right-side out.

5. Trim the seam allowance close to the seam near the point. Then turn the sewn flag right-side out. (I used a wooden skewer to gently prod the narrow end into a point.) Press.

6. Repeat the above steps until you have enough flags for your desired length. Using double-folded bias tape (available at a sewing supply store), insert the flag tops into the centre of the folded tape and sew close along the bottom edge of the tape.

7. Hang and enjoy!

Did you re-imagine any of your Christmas traditions this year?

I Think Homer Simpson May Be On To Something

The weeks leading up to the holidays were exceptionally busy for our family (which explains my blogging silence), with the top-3 developments being: 1) we adopted a second dog (yes, we're crazy); 2) all 4 kids were truly ill, and have continued to be for the past month; and 3) I got a job!

Perhaps it was all this extra stress on top of the usual holiday busyness, or maybe my kids are just going through a really annoying phase, but this Christmas season I did not have "peace" and "joy" at the forefront of my thoughts. Nope. Rather, the past few weeks I've wanted to throttle my young'uns more than at any other time.

Please understand that we did enjoy many moments of fun preparing for and celebrating Christmas --it wasn't a total wash. And, most important, I did not in any way actually throttle my kids. I just really, really wanted to. I even began to understand Homer Simpson and the impetus for his over-the-top methods of discipline.

I've reached previously-unknown levels of anger before in response to my boys' periodic misdeeds --you know, all that stuff that makes parents crazy, like non-stop complaining, outrageous fickleness, baiting you to see how you react... But for the past few weeks it has seemed that we spend all day, every day mired in these behaviours.

And this affliction of sour-puss-ness has beset not just one, but all of the boys. So I've been trying to deal with one insolent lad and have had the others, one after another, add their own needs to the mix, always things that require my immediate intervention. The net result is that I feel like I whirl from one problem to the next until we finally wrestle the kids into bed.

I admit that I found this year's holiday a bit disappointing, as a lot of things didn't get done or felt rushed due to everyone's crankiness or low energies. But the reason I share our experience is to let anyone else who needs it know that sometimes family celebrations fall a little short of the Norman Rockwell ideal, and that in those moments we all identify a little with Homer Simpson. (*Though we never behave like Homer Simpson, because we are the adults, we know better and that would never be okay.)

So... how was your holiday?

The Quilt: Get A Life

Some of you may wonder, why a quilt? Well, last winter I was taking stock of my life (a terrible idea, by the way) and I realized that I have no hobbies. Yes, I have activities, memberships and interests --which I see as all being purpose-driven.

But I wanted something that's just for fun, that I can daydream about, that's stimulating without adding pressure.

Fascinating, you say, but it still doesn't explain why a quilt? Well, I opted to make a quilt to help me get a life because: 

• I can sew (note I did not say I love to sew. Some people do; I, on the other hand, have a functional --and sometimes antagonistic-- relationship with my sewing machine);
• I can work on a quilt in little, tiny increments in between interruptions;
• I am attracted to the historicity of quilting and its place in women's experiences;
• and, finally, I feel no urgency to complete such a project (other than meeting a self-imposed deadline), as no one will suffer if it takes me until eternity.

Plus, I like pretty fabric. Another added bonus is that there's a large (very large, it turns out) community of quilters and fabric artists online. Inspiration, tutorials and encouragement abound.

In case you're wondering what kind of quilt I'm making, the design is called "Liberty Coins" from the book Quilts Galore by Diana McClun and Laura Nownes (1991).

If you've embarked on a similar journey, share! I'd love to hear about it! What are you doing, and where do you find encouragement?

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(My quilting will have to take a break for the next month, as I'll be occupied with Christmas-related projects. Details to come!)